Sooooo we went to the Emergency Room yesterday, and by "we" I mean Alex. His tummy button basically imploded. It was really loose so I checked the water in the balloon ans it was a little low...but just a little....BUT about 2 hours later it was hanging almost completely out of his body. Now if the button comes out and you don't have anything to put back into the hole it will start to close up, you get about 15 minutes before that happens. I checked the water in the balloon again and it was gone. CRAP! I unpacked the emergency button and got ready to change out the button...I hate changing the button...of all the thing that I do to Alex this is one of them that really suck....it doesn't hurt i'm just a big lame dork and the sight of a bunch of gook oozing out of a hole in my kid sort of grosses me out. But, I got the stuff ready...new button, surgical lube, all the stuff. I deflated the balloon and tugged to take out the old and put in the new....nope...try again...tug...yelling baby...tug....screaming baby...tug...mother fucker! The balloon is stuck! Damn! Damn! Damn! I call the Gastro-blah blah doctor...it's Saturday...he's in San Diego. I call the Pediatrician...nice man...his words "what the hell! Take him to the emergency room"
I went to the "new children's emergency room @UMC" part of the new children's hospital that is supposed to open in a year, very clean, very new...haven't seen more than a broken arm or the flu. Because Alex is Alex we are in the system....fragile cardiac status...ha ha ha...fragile mother's mental status. The doc sees us, an Associate Professor, no residents, and after some gentle twisting and maneuvering...he gets the button out. The button had exploded and was inside out....yeah, no way I was getting that out at home. The whole thing took 30 minutes.....then they wanted an X-ray...just to check! 4 HOURS LATER.....we got the x-ray...they had nothing there...they had never seen a tummy button before...they had no idea what to do with a heart kid who could conceivable stroke out at any time they pissed him off. Now we had a resident...idiot...nagged her to death...no we don't want to be admitted....stupid ass....order the X-ray princess...don't think that one's gonna make it as a doctor. Finally we busted out, more to me being horribly annoying than anything else and came home. Alex slept, Tyson slept, Charlie slept.......I packed.
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